Monday, October 13, 2008

Achande mol

At some misty time in the forgotten days of my youth, I'd been asked to guess the age of my father. 'Sixty five!" I'd crowed, liking the sound of the words. Needless to say everyone else crowed with laughter. Today I was asked the same question and in all truth I didn't know! The thing about him is that he doesn't seem to have changed at all from that fateful day, yet he seems to have changed so much. He's one of the few constants that ever-changing life gifted me.

I remember those afternoons when my brother and I would race to the door to be the first to welcome my father home from work. The innumerable times we'd pummeled into him must have left his ribs permanently damaged. And then of course- despite the gargantuan lunch we'd consumed- we'd vie for the special morsel he'd feed us from his plate. And in all truth, he even made mulagooshyam taste nice! There were the myriad programs he would organise, the skits and the kadhaprasangams he scripted. I still remember the lines which he spent days relentlessly drilling into my rather unwilling head. My mother still maintains that had he had a hand in our studies- we'd have been topping all our classes. Thankfully he never did :P. He is an exacting person and one whose approval is a thing of great value simply because he bestows it sparingly. Which,while it commanded a healthy amount of respect from all and sundry,at the same time made him slightly intimidating. We'd think twice thrice and several more times before we risk testing his patience. In fact the only person who'd actually attempt this and escape more or less unscathed was my brother- who can charm the fangs off a serpent, so he's definitely a special case.

And now we are all different yet the same. I am an ocean away. My brother is usually studying or away when my father gets back from work. The entire pattern of our lives is different. Often we come in friction with our father and there are uncomfortable tensions. His patience is tested more times than a rich invalid. Things are so much more complicated. There are fewer shared activities, fewer common interests. Maybe it's generation gap ... At some level I suppose with self reliance there also came some distancing. And yet for all that, our father never changed. He still makes sure everything is all right- like he used to when there was no one else to do the drawing assignment. Or like he did while helping me fill out my M.A applications.

I may no longer be that tiny baby who used to sleep on your stomach. I may not fit on the sofa along with you anymore.I may seem distant and un-understandable(not just when I talk too fast). I may sound like I don't value you. I may seem irreverant and disobedient. I may never become as great as you think me to be. But the fact that you think I'm great makes me glad all the same- because you don't bestow your approval lightly. And the fact that you given me someone like you to look up to makes me a much better person. May be I should blame you for having such high standards in the people category :D.

Thank you Acha, for being you.

Happy birthday :)

13 comments:

Jan said...

Awwww... Cho cute! :D Dads are the best, aren't they?

Your dad is so much fun! I remember I was initially intimidated by him--cos he was so quiet n all. But then I realised he has a subtle sense of humour lurking beneath the surface... Lol! Kerala was damn fun and so well organized--we saw so much of it only due to your parents' amazing organizational skills, I know! hehe... Even when we were driving them nuts with our collective tardiness!

Wish him happy birthday from me!

Jan said...

And woman! Phobic to Mallu/Hindi/Tamil serials? Aw, c'mon, you don't mean that! I KNOW you secretly love watching them :D I must note though, that I thought all serials were equally bad--until I watched Hindi serials! They really push the boundaries of horrible! *shudder*

AtomicGitten said...

Yes they are... :)
Lol! My poor father is the comparatively sane member of the family. Though he surprises us with bursts of quirkiness sometimes.:D The trip was amazing. I'm so glad all of you could make it.:D
I will convey your wishes :)

Ahem- I'm allergic to those sad excuses for entertainment. I thought themallu ones were bad. The tamil ones were worse. But the worst of them all were the hindi ones!

Sigh, we need to write a good one and bring in a serial renaissance! :D

Materialmom said...

lump-in-throat-making-post.
and a lovely birthday gift.

It made me wish I had expressed to my father my feelings for him.

notgogol said...

I wouldn't usually comment on a post like this but then again... I realize that it's so much more difficult to be genuine than funny/witty.

AtomicGitten said...

Material Mom: It was the least I could do... :)

Notgogol: Thanks, I appreciate it :)

Poshgit said...

simply beautiful post girl...

AtomicGitten said...

Thanks Posh :)

notgogol said...

10 days since last update!

Materialmom said...

when kids keep quiet you can be sure some mischief is afoot.
wonder what is keeping you quiet...

AtomicGitten said...

NG: So not true! It's only been a week! And a few days...

M.M: Ahem. I believe this is the part way I say: "Pot calling the kettle black!"
When was your last update,madam?

notgogol said...

Ahem!!
Your latest post is dated Oct 17th!!
You are obviously cheating, living in a different month zone (which from your recent post and previous arabic lesson blogs is Kuwait) or exploiting the Theory of Relatavity to the hilt.
Lola, where are you???

AtomicGitten said...

NG: Ok fine! I admit it,I started the post earlier and procrastinated. Humph!. And no I'm not Kuwait. The only thing I'm exploiting right now is my aptitude for insomnia. :D
Lola's off drinking karikku and chompng on pazham poris.(the lucky thing!)