Friday, March 14, 2008

Dear God(!)

Aged five I prayed that I'd have those wonderfully 'grown-up' glasses and look the consummate intellectual. Aged fifteen I cursed the day I got my glasses and screamed heavenwards, railing at God for placing me in this predicament.This is what God has to go through everyday! It's like that Cycle agarbathi ad, where the mum prays for one thing and her son for the binary opposite. Either way God ends up being the Villain.

Picture a day in the existence of God. There is no question of waking up, since there's no sleep.The droning prayers, more irritating than the most tenacious mosquito,remove any hopes for that. All you have to do is ensure the smooth running of the universe and all, no big deal. Oh and perform a few miracles here save a few souls there,act as guidance counselor to some X million people. Please note that this is excluding the animal and plant kingdom. And while all this is happening you'll also have to spend time answering prayers,getting cursed for answering them negatively, sometimes even when you answer postively. Oh and by the way half the world doesn't really believe in you and the other half is scared stiff of you. And practically no one tries to understand you. Hell,Nietzsche says you're dead.

It's a sad fate to be God.

And it's not just the work, it's the prayers themselves. They're just whines which sound even worse because the whiners are always in such a hurry to get it over with. Every time I hear the rosary being chanted, I feel sorry for Mary who has to listen to it all the time. Same goes for the mantras that are chanted in the temples or the muezzin's call. Half the time we don't even know what we are saying,but that doesn't make any difference.

And then there are the modes of praying . At some point of time, Swami Chinmayananda had said "Don't be a beggar in front of God". Hence,we- being masters of the fine print-demand. "I deserve to get this. Therefore you will give it to me!" And then there is the challenge mode. You bully God into answering your prayers."I did these,these,these good deeds," And then you cock a contemptuous eyebrow and ask, "What did You do?" The fuzzy logic is that God will feel defensive and answer your prayers. And of course there is the 'simple want' mode. "I'm very reasonable.All I want is half the world and everything of value in the other." The word 'reasonable' is supposed to lull God into answering the prayer positively without looking at it.

The truth is, man has created God in his image. And he(a pronoun of convenience) doesn't even get the little respect that we accord to a wily human.

At this point, I would like to send up a prayer for God to... whatever Other Power that we can create. Please help the Poor Dude. Life, the universe and everything are a thankless lot. And Dear God, I think you're doing an ok job, considering the circumstances. You do have one supporter;even if the supporter is only a diminutive thing with a big mouth. I'm rooting for You. :)

7 comments:

Ms. Lane said...

Hehe! Good one Sree! Poor God I can imagine his state in the next week.. with easter and everything.

Anush said...

I'm rooting for You

awww! thanks sweety!

Materialmom said...

You are so right. Poor Mary. The last 2 lines of the post are vivid - the diminutive figure with a big mouth

AtomicGitten said...

Rini: Thanks much Bentley. Thy support spurs us on. :D

Crazybugga:... a point i left out in the post. God also has to suffer the acute insult of mediocre mortals aspiring to take on the God identity.The God-Complex is a very embarassing thing.

Material Mom: Lol! Right, now that's what I call a back handed compliment :D

Anush said...

God also has to suffer the acute insult of mediocre mortals aspiring to take on the God identity.

ya, temme about it! ooof!

Materialmom said...

It was not meant to be backhanded. I felt the picture was v cute, like a cartoon.

AtomicGitten said...

Crazybugga: .......

MaterialMom: Oh!...ok! thanks! It's been a long time since i got an actual compliment.:D